April 20, 2011

Of all the stupid mistakes to make. We went to clinic today for Tanner’s Final Spinal… only it wasn’t. There’s one more. But, somehow, I miscalculated the dates.

Wouldn’t be a huge deal except that Tanner has such anxiety about these LPs. So much so, that she actually had a pretty serious panic attack last night. She handled herself beautifully today, though. When we figured out the mistake I had made, she was initially upset, but forgave me quickly and we kept her very occupied with some new games downloaded to John’s iPad and Sara, the childlife specialist, who comes with us each time to help distract her and make things easier for her. Such wonderful people.

We celebrated my mistake with a cake that said, “Happy next to Final Spinal” on top. All you can do is try to make the best, right?

Tanner’s counts were down some… her neutraphils were at 780, which is neutropenic, but not severely so. Dr. Mixan felt like since we’re past flu and cold season, she could still go to school, but we’re a little nervous about that. She has off Friday and Monday anyway, so we will probably just keep her home tomorrow and hope she recovers some. We’ll go in for a counts check again next Wednesday to see if she’s come up any.

We found out some very sad news today. Both Tanner’s doctor and nurse are leaving. Dr. Mixan is a third year fellow and took a job in Chatanooga. He will be leaving in July and we will need to select another doctor to guide us through the rest of this journey. And, Cari, Tanner’s nurse who has been with us since the beginning of treatment, is changing jobs within the hospital. While we may see her from time to time, she will no longer be our regular nurse. We opted not to tell Tanner this today considering she was already anxious. This will be a big blow to Tanner. The bond between nurse and child in the clinic is really not to be underestimated. There is a real trust and love there and Cari had tears in her eyes when she told me she was leaving. Tanner will have a hard time with the transition and I hate that both of them are leaving at essentially the same time. We’ll let Cari tell her in her own way when we come in for counts next week and hopefully, we’ll bond with another nurse quickly, but both Cari and Dr. Mixan will very hard to replace.

Tanner will be on the Channel 5 news in the next few days. They were doing a segment on Eli, the three-legged therapy dog that visits the infusion room regularly. The kids love him and they interviewed my oh so shy child about having the dog in clinic. I’ll let you know when it is going to be on.

I’m going to bed now. Between the storms we had last night and the fact that Tanner and Jake were both in bed with me at some point last night, I got little to no sleep. And, clinic day with an LP is a long, exhausting day. So, I’m whipped.

Love,
Beth