September 20, 2009 Do you ever have one of those moments where you feel all is right with the world and you are exactly where you are supposed to be? I find myself having these moments sometimes when all four of us are together and something just clicks and I feel supremely happy.

This weekend, after having spent a rainy, but great morning volunteering at the Nashville Polycystic Kidney Disease Walk with my girlfriends and then running some errands in the afternoon, I arrived home to find that John and the kids had built this HUGE fort in the living room. It involved the usual chairs and blankets, but they had gone beyond any structure I had ever dared built and had a small condo of sorts under there. After dinner and a quick bike ride around the neighborhood, we all got under there together, even the dog! Tanner had her laptop under there playing a computer game, John and Jake were wrestling and I was throwing a tennis ball out of the tent for the dog, who was bringing it back over and over again. John and I kept laughing about how crawling around in a 3 foot high fort would have been much easier in our twenties.

It was a simple moment and, to tell you the truth, I had a chair leg digging into my back most of the time, but something about it made me so happy. It was one of those times where I realize, that for every time I wish I were napping on the sofa instead of playing Polly Pockets or listening to Coldplay instead of KidzBop in the car, there is a moment like this that makes me realize I could never be this happy without Tanner and Jake.

Yesterday morning was the Franklin 4 the Cure event at Westhaven to raise money for childhood cancer. Tanner’s Trotters braved the rain to run in Tanner’s honor and we are so grateful to them for their generosity and determination! John ended up not being able to go to the race after all; our babysitter got sick and couldn’t make it, but Leslie and Keith Harper, who spearheaded the team, came by after the race to bring Tanner a t-shirt and show her the ones they had worn, with Tanner’s Trotters printed on the front with a Sharpie. Many thanks to them for organizing and running and for coming by afterward to see the kids, when I know they would have rather gone home to take a nap. It meant a lot to Tanner.

We’ve been a little on the down low this weekend; not only has it rained, but both of us feel that Tanner’s energy level is a little off due to the anemia. She would gladly go until she dropped, if given the opportunity, but we’ve been trying to keep her from wearing herself out. Today, we spent the afternoon with John’s brother, Michael; sister-in-law, Amanda; and nephew, Mack, who is six. They live right here in Nashville, but we don’t see them enough, for one reason or another, and it was great to spend a spontaneous afternoon at their house over pizza.

On the way home, there was a beautiful sunset and Jake was amazed by the colors. I love his unjaded view of the world. He was still talking sleepily about the “cowors” when I put him in his crib.

Oddly, Tanner has had less severe side-effects from this round of chemo, despite the fact that she received more chemo this week than last. She was nauseated the first day, but up the second and has only had sporadic nausea since then. Overall, Tanner has had fewer side effects than many on chemo, and for that, I am so thankful. With usual Tanner enthusiasm, she has thrown herself at cancer just like she does everything else, and is doing so much better than we could have hoped at this point.

So, even though the rain is supposed to continue all week long, I think I’ve found my happy place again.

Love,
Beth