January 26, 2010
We spent Saturday night at one of our favorite places with some of our favorite people. We went to the circus!!! I LOVE the circus. I would go if I didn’t have kids and so would John. I had put it on our calendar a month or more before, but was struggling with whether it was safe to take Tanner into that crowd of people. It’s one thing to be at a restaurant with other people in the next booth, it’s another to sit with people who may or may not be healthy on all sides of you.
John’s company, Franklin American Mortgage Company, made the decision easy. They gave us their suite so we could go without worry and invite friends, too. We had an awesome time with two other families. It’s a big thing for Tanner to be able to do something like this… and Jake, too. We realized at the Circus that Jake has experienced a lot less than Tanner at the same age because he’s been sheltered due to our situation. He was super excited!!! We all laughed at him because he just kept jumping up and down and screaming at random moments because he was so happy.
Thursday night will be another big night. Two representatives from Make a Wish are coming to interview Tanner about her wish. She is so excited, but very conflicted. She really thought she wanted to go to Disney World, but now wants to maybe meet the cast of one of her favorite TV shows and ask to be in an episode. Decisions, decisions. I was hoping for Disney, but whatever she wants will be fine. I just want it to be special for her. It will be interesting to see what she comes up with.
And, Thursday morning is clinic day. It has, unbelievably, been a month since we have been to the hospital. Surreal. She will get a dose of Vincristine in her port and see the doctor. She also starts her monthly five-day steroid pulse.
We are hoping her counts have remained between 1,000 and 2,000 so that they don’t raise her chemo levels. No more chemo, please. Also, if her counts have remained steady, maybe they will clear her to go back to school.
John’s Mom, Ann, is coming with us to clinic on Thursday and then taking Tanner to the movies afterwards. They are going to spend the day together. Tanner is super excited.
Tanner continues to feel really good most of the time. She has periodic nausea and body pains and fatigues more easily than normal, but mostly seems like any six-year-old. Still, the chemo is there. She got sick yesterday morning for no apparent reason that I could figure except the chemo. Weird since Tanner only got sick twice during all the chemo she has received. But, a reminder that even in maintenance, the chemo is still there, still poisonous, still eating at her.
Still, I’ll take maintenance over the past six months any day. The freedom that it brings, the ability for Tanner to regain strength and stamina. The possibility of school and friends.
Big Things… Good Things… Hopeful Things.